What Time Is It? Duck Time!

Laughter really is the best medicine, and the best place to take that medicine is at home. Sometimes I dream about being a stand up comedian, but I can’t do accents, pull funny faces, or come up with original material. Since I’m unable to make myself laugh, and after Seinfeld and Everybody love’s Raymond retired, I asked God to keep me amused—Come on Big Guy, make me laugh.

It took a while; a separation, a runaway child, and two no we’ll never speak to you again daughters, but the Big Fella came good. “My son, I give you the duck. She’s a little bit scrappy, but she’s clean and will make you laugh.” Thanks Man-in-the-Sky.

I’m proud to present, Scrappy Duck.

Mother duck has booked a three week holiday to New Zealand, and I was checking the itinerary in my emails when Scrappy looked over my Shoulder.

SD: “What time do we leave?”

ME: “Six thirty.”

SD: “How long does it take to get there?”

Me: “Three hours.”

SD: “How come it says we arrive at 12:40?”

Me: “New Zealand is three hours ahead of us, so we leave here at 9:30 NZ time.”

Ducks are curious and Scrappy’s breast feathers pushed against my shoulder like down compressed in a tontine pillow. Her bright duck eyes and excited beak have found something.

SD: “Hey look. It only takes forty minutes to get home. We leave at 7 and we’re home at 7:40”

Me: Head hits desk! Because Scrappy is a gift from God she has great power and influence, and her wisdom affects us all.

“Aaaah, what are you two doing?”

Tink: “Scrappy is in the house. Dogs are smart dad, we have to protect ourselves.”

Max: “I can’t reach my balls.”

Tink: “See dad, I didn’t get his gamma duck shield on quick enough.”

I’m grateful that I have people and pets around me who make me smile. If you have a funny story I’d love to hear it. Speak to you soon, Simon.

For more Soul Healing, visit simonhay.com.au.